Month: January 2021

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Little Addictions (Sugar)

I have a confession to make!  I am addicted to Social Media and Sugar!  Surely, I am not the only one but I am finding it to be more of hindrance the longer it goes on.  People may think, “oh well, that’s common” or “no big deal” but it’s really becoming a big deal as it saps my time and my energy and feeds a self loathing that paralyzes.  I know it’s not an addiction that is going to kill me like hard drugs or severe alcoholism with a rock bottom sad story (unless you count the fact that sugar feeds cancer cells, causes diabetes and is the biggest factor in the obesity crisis) but it is sucking away my joy and my dreams.  

I am, and probably have always been an emotional eater.  Chocolate and home baked goods are my chosen poison and I am a great baker, if I do say so myself.  That afternoon energy dip, that stressful situation, PMS, bad night’s sleep or even that celebration are all reasons to eat something delicious and insulin spiking.  I have tried different sugar alternatives and found most of them wanting in taste or just plain disgusting.  I know you can change your taste buds and it’s all about what you get used to but I am not up for weird after tastes.  

Of course with that inability, or perhaps determination, to not change comes the extra weight.  I did my BMI (body mass index) measurement the other day and was disappointed and embarrassed to say I am considered obese.  Overweight, yes.  But Obese, that was a surprise!  I know people can say it’s not an accurate assessment and all that jazz but it really was a bit of a “Wow” moment for me.  

Vanishing Excuses

In the past I could use lack of time, lack of energy, little kids, etc. as an excuse.  But I have more time than ever now that my kids are back in school, my energy levels are up from some improvements to my health and my youngest is nearly 10!  My excuses are all dried up and the real reason is all “up in my face”.  The problem is me!  The problem has always been me!  Of course those reasons made things harder of course but if I really had wanted it maybe I would have done it.  

This year I turned 40.  I have begun to think about the future and my and my husband’s health a little more.  I want us to be active, healthy and our midlife and later years to be without one health problem or another. No one wants to feel as though they are a burden to their spouse or their kids, but a blessing instead.  

So, saying all this means I have to do something.  Honestly, I feel like a kid kicking and screaming being dragged away from something I love.  I remember when I was young and exercise was easy.  It is not easy anymore, I am shamefully out of shape.  Walking up a flight of stairs is breathtaking!  Literally!  But then this quote I saw on Facebook the other day really stood out to me.  

Marriage is hard. Divorce is hard. Choose your hard.

Obesity is hard. Being fit is hard. Choose your hard.

Being in debt is hard. Being financially disciplined is hard. Choose your hard.

Communication is hard. Not communicating is hard. Choose your hard.

Life will never be easy. It will always be hard. But we can choose our hard. Pick wisely.

-Sean H

Choosing the Right Hard

So, being overweight and unhealthy is hard but so is being fit,  What am I going to choose?  Obviously, the wise choice would be to get fit.  I need to learn how to control my desire for the quick pleasurable hit of sugar for the lasting benefit of my health.  Not a fad diet but a lifestyle change.  I need to consistently make the right choices, day in and day out.  From my point of view, that is very simple but very hard .  I am not one to be considered very self disciplined!  I am in battle with, (and find myself angry at) myself on a regular basis for my constant distraction and inconsistency.  External motivation gets my mojo going but my internal motivation is the pits.  My only hope is Jesus!  I am so thankful I was raised in a Godly family and was too scared for any risky types of behaviour as I might have ended up a drug addict had I experimented.    

Abundant Life

We as Christians have all heard that the body is a temple (1 Corinthians 3:16-17) but the thing that gets me in my conscience is all the things I won’t be able to do if I am unhealthy and sick.  I can’t be the mom, wife, daughter, community member and hopefully someday, nanny (grandma to most of you) that God has called me to be.  God wants us to have full and awesome lives as John 10:10 says, “I have come that they might have life and that they might have it more abundantly”. Sure, Jesus heals but wouldn’t it be better to avoid sickness in the first place?!  Isn’t that just being a good steward of what he has given us? 

I don’t know about you, but I really need a deeper closeness with Jesus to make those good choices, day in and day out.  Instead of emotionally eating, I need to bring my emotions to Jesus for soothing. He is better than the sugar high and crash of chocolate any day. I realize I cannot and will probably never be able to do it alone.  That is the beauty of his presence in our lives.  He is always, always, always there and as we walk in the Spirit we will not fulfill the desires of the flesh (Galatians 5:16).

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Heart Soil

Jesus talked about seeds (the Word of God) being sown in different soils and the resulting fruit, or lack thereof.  It is commonly called the Parable of the Sower and can be found in Matthew 13.  The rocky soil, the path (or compacted soil) and the soil full of thorns or weeds ended with the seed producing no fruit; either the seed never had the opportunity to grow or the young plant died.  The seed was the same in each case but the soil was the defining factor.  He was obviously using soil as a metaphor for the condition of our hearts in receiving or not receiving the Word of God.  

I have read or heard that parable for years, and wondered, “what soil was I?”.  I wanted to be the right soil but I wasn’t quite sure exactly what that looked like or how to produce it.  Was it just something you were or weren’t?  You know, just like genetics giving you your height, skin color, hair, health, athletic ability, etc? Did you just have a good “heart soil” or not? 

Greenhouses and farmers

I am a gardener and worked in greenhouses for 7 years.  In a greenhouse the soil is usually prepackaged with no weeds and sometimes isn’t really true soil, but a “growing medium”.  A growing medium is usually sphagnum peat moss, vermiculite, perlite, and maybe compost, coconut coir, wetting agents or other such things. This creates an environment that is easy for the plants to grow in since they are limited by their pot size and may be on a timed schedule.  But in the garden and on the farm you have real soil.  Soil can be rocky, dry, clay, lacking in humus (organic matter) and a host of other possible problems.  Making your soil better can be as easy as adding some bagged manure in a small garden but on a farm it can take a lot more time.  Your options can be adding manure if you can get your hands on enough of it, (for instance if you have a large livestock operation you run).  You can salvage what organic matter you have by plowing as little as possible.

Cover Crops are Made to Die

A time tested and time consuming way to improve your soil is to add a cover crop.  That crop grows and then you cut it and plow it under to let it die and improve your soil.  You do not get a harvest from your cover crop!  Its only purpose is to improve the soil for a future crop and harvest.  That may seem like a waste to put in all that effort in planting and fertilizing and waiting just to watch the crop die.  But the farmer who does it is hopeful and wise and patient.  He knows this strategy works and will reap him better harvests in the future. 

Fruitful

I have been reading a book by Beth Moore called “Chasing Vines” which illustrates the parallels between Viticulture and how God works in us to be fruitful.  Viticulture is the cultivation and harvesting of grapes which of course is very closely related to winemaking.  The bible is full of metaphors about vines and branches, wine and agriculture in reference to us as His people. In it she talks about soil as part of being fruitful.  Soil is made better by adding organic matter.  Organic material ultimately comes from dead material: dead plants, leaves, manure, microorganisms, insects, etc. She states that sometimes the dead things in our lives are meant to make our soil better so that we can be more fruitful.  Those dead things can be dreams, relationships, jobs, a loved one, expectations, almost anything that is lost and brings us pain.  It’s a sobering but hopeful thought.  

God is the Master Gardener

God is the master gardener and we are not in a greenhouse limited by the size of our pot.  We are in the real world and we have real soil and are lovingly unlimited.  Our roots can go as far as they please.  He prunes, He waters, gives sunshine and He plants seeds but He also improves the soil of our hearts.  Jesus said to take up our cross and follow Him (Matthew 16:24-26).  A cross is a symbol of death, death to ourselves, death to our will, our dreams, our selfishness and so on.  That death is the organic matter our roots are craving.  It’s the dead material that will be a source of nourishment that will ultimately produce fruit, a harvest in Him.  Would I prefer another way?  You better believe it!  But even the Father had to have His Son die to produce the harvest of us as his kids.  Life has suffering at times but to have that suffering made useful we have His hand use it for us to make our heart soil, good soil.  Good soil which receives the Word of God which produces a harvest.